Striving to be a Better Parent

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Of course we all want to be better. Each and every day, we try. Each and everyday, we hope we're better for our children than yesterday.

Oh boy, Fonker is pretty serious today. Why???

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Well, things are pretty kick-ass here at home. Just learned yesterday (Thursday)that release of cards is tomorrow (Saturday). And only learned today the boys' academic ranking.

As always, 8year old is tenth in class. Yey. Yey because I don't push him to be in the top 10, but he is. All I bug him for is to pass requirements on schedule.

12year old is no.3! A first time for the family. I also don't bug him, except for the basic things like monitoring deadlines, etc. He's always ranked 6th-8th every quarter, so this is a happy time for all of us.

He has his awarding program tomorrow, so I'm very proud.

Plus I didn't forget my manners and told both boys I'm proud of them.

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So here I am, doing laundry, after the boys have gone to sleep...
Like you I get my most profound philosophies while doing the laundry...

And I felt like the luckiest Mother Fonker in the world...

*Birds chirping*

Sigh. I'm really so lucky with my boys....

Brsht... Wetaminute! Wetaminute!

And it all flashes in my head.

- Uniforms/ costumes needed to be worn for a certain day, but still unwashed the morning it's needed,

- School supplies needed, but forgot to buy,

- Getting home early unannounced, but I'm out, so a son sits outside and patiently waits for me.

- Mixed-up schedules,

- Food unprepared,

- Or not attending a special school event... (something I've improved on since I work at home now)

- and the nastier episodes, like lecturing a son about an error (read: ranting, raving and 360-degree head turns from me) ... and turns out it wasn't his mistake (or worse - it's my mistake!)

So many goof-offs from me!

Oh yeah, you bet I'm tearing my hair out right now. Plus there's this lone tear glistening in my eye.

Like I don't deserve them! Not at all...

How the fonk does a dorky, unorganized mom get ok kids???

Law of balance?

Like my mom, she's perfect. She's suspiciously a Filipina clone of Martha Stewart. Pristine and immaculate house, balanced meals, she did everything!

And we turned out to be .. lazy ass house-morons, inconsiderate for family, etc etc. And my mom, well, house-perfect that she is, she's a different story. For now, let's just say she's a ticking bomb eager for every chance to explode. Sometimes, we don't like her at all. Always, I'd gladly trade an imperfect household with a mom I really like ALL the time.

Is it really in our imperfections as parents that our kids grow up hardy and upright? Me, I acknowledge my weaknesses to the boys, and ask for their help when I know I can't do it.

(And you can pretty well imagine how ballistic my mom gets when I ask for the boys
help, especially with chores. She wants me to do everything, like she did. Like hell I would!)

Oh hell. Whatever! However imperfect we may think of ourselves, our kids love us, and think the world of us. It also helps a lot that whatever imperfections we have, they think all families have the same kind of dork moms. Later, as adults, when they find out that their mother IS the ONLY goofball among a lot of mothers, they'll shake their heads that we pulled one on them.