Sick and Sicker during Son's Field Trip

I accompanied 8 year old to his field trip yesterday. Woke up feeling chilly... found it odd that 30 minutes later, despite all attempts at stretching and warming up, I still felt cold.

First stop, kids were enjoying playing. If there's anything that makes me and my heart smile, it's the sound of children laughing, squealing, shouting happily and romping around (should be in combination with the laughing, though.)

But I still felt weak. Wanted to work in the bus, but felt too weak I slept and slept.

Also felt vomit-y, so I didn't eat. Imagine the horror of a mom vomiting at the field trip, instead of a child!

Lugged myself around, weakly. Much to my child's boredom, who wanted to run and run, but also wanted to wait for me.

The field trip was nice. With long time for the children to play, and still learn about the sciences and fine arts (we watched a "primer for kids" ballet. Showed the boys that ballet wasn't for wussy boys only).

- - -

Last stop: theme park with rides

At the ticket stand - as the staff was putting on my ride-all-you-can wrist ticket, asks me:

"Ma'am, are you pregnant?"

I go in my head "What the fonk????? Been working hard to drop 2 dress sizes and you ask me if I'm pregnant???" When you're not feeling well, you're not really very understanding. I use my mental kung fu skills on her... ya!- ya!- hiii-yaa! Her head rolls on the floor.

But instead, I go "No I'm not. And I'm sick, I won't even use this ticket."

Back to my weak wobbling around the park.



Later on, as 8 year old rode with a classmate, I sat with the classmate's parent. After the ride, the boys run to us, tell us their next ride and speed off.

Classmate's mom asks me: (In true Filipino tactlessness)

"He looks like his dad, right?"

(Since my son is always told he's good looking, I go Gaaack!)

But since I like her, her son and their little daughter with us, I didn't use my mental kung fu on her.

I just say "No, he just looks like the neighbors."

Outdated Learnings in School

Last time I went to school was 80s-90s. I noticed that, by the time 12year old was using books in the late 90s, there have been a lot of new info (not so new now) that have deported the stuff I learned in school to the classroom trashbin.

Here are some those nitty gritty ek-ek I've picked up along the way.

There are a lot, but these are all I remember off my head right now.
I will update this as we go along the way.


MATHEMATICS

1. Order of operations in solving any number sentence

OLD (My time) - M.D.A.S
Multiply - Divide first; then add - subtract

NOW - PEMDAS
(When I saw this in my son's notebook, I went WTF??@&#**&#&$!!)
Turns out this is : Solve within Parenthesis first, then
Exponents, then Multiply-Divide, Add-Subtract. Ah, ok.

2. Mental Maths

OLD - Brief section in curriculum, application depending on whim of
teacher.
Most solving is made with our trusty pen, paper and scratch paper.
Solved right to left.
Special deductions if you don't show the solution.


NEW - Kids are expected to be suddenly adept in mental maths.
Used much more than in our time.
Subject's child's answers to a lot of error.
Mental maths are excellent to be used, but I think only when the
child has the solid foundation of greasy written computation.

Connected to mental maths, I see techniques of children solving
left to right. Also subject to a lot of error. A tragedy!

3. On coming up with Solutions

OLD - If you produce the correct answer with a different
solution, instead of getting cherubic singing and the opening of
heaven's gates because of your creativity (and daring!),
your answer is marked wrong.

NEW - A little better - These days, other solutions are highly welcome.
Plus points for outsmarting the teacher.


SCIENCE

1. Planets with Rings

OLD - I swear I only know Saturn.

NOW - Saturn AND Uranus.
Plus Uranus' ring is vertical.



2. Pluto

OLD - Definitely a planet

NOW - Demoted. Some landform floating in space, not a planet


HEALTH (I separated this from science, since most likely, there's a lot)

1. Food Pyramid

OLD - Horizontal layers accdg to carbs, veggies, fruits, meat, oil and sugar



NEW - Vertical layers, same categories to highlight that all are equally important anyways, no one at the top (most important) or bottom (least important). My 2cents : Excellent move!




GEOGRAPHY



1. Regions in the Philippines

OLD - In school, we learned there were 12. plus 12-A, so 13 in all

NEW - A lot. Lot. More. I dunno. I always sucked at this.

I PROTEST!

I protest the removal of the cartoon Atashin' Chi at GMA-7 the 8:30AM slot!

Boooooooowh!

Field Trip

"Mom, mom!" 8year old panted as he stormed into the house.

"Come with me to our field trip!"

Do you still want me to go with you? Or are you asking me because everyone else is bringing a guardian? Just making sure I'm not violating his 8 year old turf. "You really want me to go?"

8yo Nods.

Ok then. Where are we going?

"Crocodile farm!"

Crocodile farm... Where's that?

"I dunno."

Silence.

Ooh. I know I know I know....!

We're going to Congress! I laugh my maniacal laugh...

The humor is lost to 8year old, who stares at me as he silently tells himself "My old woman is nuts!"

Dorky Dancing

Woooooooootttt!

I'm bursting with happiness.

I'm currently re-writing product descriptions for a site. Showed a 2500% increase in sales today!

If online businesses could only join the olympics, we could've conquered the longjump division. Legs up.

***Now I do some dork dancing***

My dork dance is any movement i feel like doing, a little more robotic, a little not in-sync, capped with ultrasuperdupermagneticfast (ehem) Running Man of the 90's. (Gaaacck).

What's your dork dance?

Long No-class

8 year old was ecstatic. "Mom, good news!"

Eh wot?

I'm top 1 in class!

Brrsshht! Nope, that was my imagination talking. I put my attention back to the 8-year old.

"No classes on August 18 and 19! Yeyyyyyyy!!!"

School's declared no classes for the Ninoy Aquino Day (originally Aug21, but moved to Aug18 by govt) and Quezon City Day on Aug.19.

However, as I research this right now, looks like govt changed the date for Ninoy's holiday and opted for Aug 20 as the non-working holiday instead.

Easy and Real Chicken Nuggets for Kids

Everybody loves those chicken nuggets in the grocery. I stopped buying several years ago though, when an environmental org came out with a list of products using genetically modified corn. The list included those chicken nuggets, and so I stopped buying.

Fast forward to today. Thing2 keeps hankering to bring nuggets to school. Seems all his classmates bring the nuggets for packed lunch.

But it has genetically modified corn! I protest.

"I don't care." says 8-year old.

Well I'll make our own.

Slow-mo scream of anguish, "Noooooo..."

Anyhoo, much to my disbelief, I made my own nuggets for 8-year old last night. At least, whatever gmo the chicken I used ate, I don't know about.

If my recipe is real primitive, (w/o measurements and all), well, that's how I cook! Drives my mom up the wall... Just want to demo that cooking for the family can be done by dorks too. Not really rocket science, just need some daring and kapal-muks(thick skin) to watch the reaction of the family.

Need: Chicken breast, flavoring, quick-cooking oats

1. Fillet the chicken breast. Slice/ chop into teeny weeny bits. Great for stress reduction.
2. Put salt and pepper to taste. Add your child's favorite flavor if any, like cajun powder or those breading mixes if you like.
3. Put some oatmeal in. Your call if you want it batter-y or dry and pasty.
4. Shape into nuggets or gold bars (the big blocks) if your child will like it so.
5. Fry in the morning. 1-2 minutes for soft nuggets, longer if you want it crispy.

What did it taste like? Mine tastes like.. chicken.

Some Modern Vocabulary from an 8-year old

Sometimes, we get cues from our kids that signal how modern technology is totally enmeshed in their brains.

Computer jargon, for example, is serving as substitutes for everyday trivial words.

"I'm coming dear, just waiting for this to download."



1. "First Blood!" - First points earned/ catch for a team.

Kids are familiar with this idiom because this is also a dialogue from the online game DOTA.

I witnessed this during the summer sportsfest. Was watching my wards (sons and niece) play the local game patintero. As the whistle signalling the start of the game tooted, the Green Team players darted across the barriers (Blue Team players). After a few moments, two players of the Green Team were captured by Blue.

As if on cue, members of the Blue Team shouted, "FIRST BLOOOOOOD!"

I gaped at the chorus.



2. "Safe Removal of Hardware" - means Potholder

"Mooooooooommm... have you seen the safe removal of hardware?" 8yo screams in the background.

Eh wott?

"Safe removal of hardware!"

Ehhhh... Why are you looking for it? What are you going to do, anyways?

I want to get some hot water from the kettle. The kettle's warm, don't want to touch it.

Oh, you mean potholder.

(Crazy!)




3. "Download" - Waiting for the toilet tank to fill up

8yo uses toilet. Stomps out of the CR, doesn't flush.

Ehem... you forgot something.

What?

The toilet. You forgot to flush.

Oh. Kuya* just used it. The tank's still empty. I'm waiting for it to download.


Kids these days...



*Kuya - a term of respect for older brothers

Originally posted 01 August 2008

Say Chess!

When I was younger, my foolish ambition is to be “intellectual.” I wanted to pursue all things intelligent.

Including chess.

Chess is an intelligent person’s game. How else do you survive the game unless you don’t make full use of your planning, strategizing and logic powers?

So, considering the intelligence aspects required of chess, it's but natural that this is one intellectual pleasure pursuit that I fail miserably.

My level of comprehension in chess is limited to 1) what move each piece is allowed to do, and 2) the spelling of this game.

- - -

My boys are better than me at this game. Maybe they got their chess skills from their sperm donor.

Last Saturday, 8 year old was playing chess with a 17-year old cousin.

Me babbling in the background: What's the rook for?
“The piece that goes in straight lines,” said 12 year old.

No, I mean what’s the equivalent of the rook’s political power?

If the pawns are the masa and lower level officials, and the king is royalty who just waves and smiles and takes care of diplomatic ties (thus they move only 1 step at the time); and the queen is the prime minister who has all the powers that be (which is why she has all the funky moves), and the bishop is the chahrch and the horse is the armed forces…. Who’s the rook?

“It’s the tower!” volunteered 8 year old.

Tower of what? Tower of power? Ivory Tower? Rapunzel’s Tower? Ah… the aviation tower! They man airplane traffic! (I can hear their eyes rolling in their heads and saying mentally, my old woman is nuts!)


- - -

Then the 8-year old ate/ captured a piece. I was astounded because I CAN’T DO THAT. I can’t “eat” anything in chess. (So I said, maybe that’s why I’m not too hot for chess, cuz I can’t eat anything?)

“CHECK!” exclaimed the 8-year old. His rook and king looked pretty chummy. I looked composed but inside, I was damn proud an 8-year old son of mine can play my frustrated sport.

The cousin made a counter attack. It was head to head. I couldn’t breathe with the suspense.

Silence… except for the sound of neurons zapping.

Then the 8-year old moved his rook DIAGONALLY to cover the king.

Brssshhhht… My balloon of happiness deflated. My fantasy of living out my failed dreams of intelligence through my son halted.

So that’s why he seemed so damn good –

He was bending the rules to protect the king!
(His maniacal laugh rang in the background. He was doing it on purpose to bait his cousin.)

Ahh… I said. Now I know the equivalent of the rook…

It’s the Secretary of Economic Development!*


* This secretary has been mum on a hot corruption scandal involving the President. Latest on him – he was appointed head of Social Security. Titigas ng fes… (rough translation: thick-skinned. But we Filipinos use this expression by referring to facial skin. )

Originally posted 24 July 2008

Corruption in Minors

I like the series of commercials in Philippine TV that is currently running these days regarding corruption.

Scenario: A boy breaks mom’s vase. His dog happily wags his tail as this happens.

Along comes the big brother, who says that “If you clean my room for an entire week, I’ll tell mom that the dog did it.”

Then some text flashes. I don’t exactly remember what it is, but it is about corruption may possibly start while young.

I’ve seen the other commercials in the series, and these are all simple and direct to the point. I like all, but the one about the two brothers, obviously struck a chord with me the most.

Year in and out, the Philippines always ranks high in the list of most corrupt countries.

Seeing the commercial, I realized that, maybe we’re always the most corrupt because we don’t know what corruption really means, and what acts constitute as such.

The people behind this commercial smartly know this. They are also smartly changing the moral standards of a country regarding corruption. Filipinos are basically kind, conscientious honest people. As long as we know what’s supposed to be right and wrong, we’re basically good.

Congratulations to the people behind this ad.

---

Speaking of corruption starting while young.

Whenever “loaded”, one of my boys likes to pay the other brother to do the dishes.

It started innocently enough, so at first I ignored it. At first I saw it through the frame of “getting paid for labor”.

However, as the practice became increasingly frequent, and as the paid brother started charging for all chores he was supposed to do, I decided to speak up.

The next time I heard about exchanges of payment and chores came a long long yada yada sermon…

“Hep-heppepep... (Like a trueblue mother) Shut it! Do you know what corruption means? It’s helping people become bad.

We’re doing chores because I want you to grow up wanting to volunteer and help our family. You are going against this spirit of volunteerism. By weaseling out of your chores, even if you are paying, you are sending messages that it’s ok to be lazy and uncooperative in our family.”

Gaaack. I am so overkill, I know. I can’t help it.

But so far, I haven’t seen any signs that this practice is still on-going.

Sigh, it’s hard to be a parent… so many things to oversee, including your child’s character.

Originally posted 06 July 2008

Boys and Grooming

I’ve always believed that it is the divine right of the male species to look and smell as great as the girls. I can only imagine how sucky it would be when guys are deprived or the pleasures we women/ girls get from preening and polishing ourselves. I enjoy it when I see guys take pleasure in caring for their physical selves. I personally believe whatever guy-softening that can be done would help a lot in other aspects of their lives. Males suffer too much backlash from the pressure of compulsory toughness.

I don’t want my sons to come out a severe cut from the macho-wacho-mold. Those types of guys are crazy (and may stink, to boot).

I would prefer the boys to grow up well-groomed and polished. People always tell them they are handsome boys. What a waste it would be if they grew up stinky and uncaring about their personal appearance.

For this school year, I’ve been preparing a “basic kikay kit” for them to use. Just the basics for young boys, of course. It contains a comb, toothbrush, toothpaste, soap and a small towel. I also included a nail cutter just in case they forget to cut their nails at home. Turned out the school also required them to have one, but I would like them to see these as their own personal items to use frequently, not just something the school requires.

12 year old's health subject requires them to have their own kits. The night before the health subject, 12 year old asked, “Ma, where’s the olive green G-kit that I washed last week-end?’”

Wha-?... Eh… What dikit?

G-kit.

Jikit?I don’t get what you’re talking about, anak.

“G-kit.” 12 year old pointed out patiently. “G-kit. Grooming kit.” I can feel the eyes on his mind rolling, although he looked normally straight at me.

Ah… G as in G, grooming kit. Dang these kids. Just when you feel you’re catching up with their conversational vocabulary, they’ve coined up new words already.

Well, I wanted them to feel it’s for them to use. How else do you identify something as not yours when you’ve named it yourself?

- - -

Yesterday, as I brisk walked through the department store in Trinoma, my eyes caught two young adult very-male guys, one testing out (he-he) eye concealer in a cosmetic counter.

I lurv eet!

I hope this males-using-cosmetics cult endures through the ages.

Originally posted 29 June 2008

Science Can be Fun

Hey. School’s back, the boys are back, so… I’m baaaaack!

8 year old is now in grade 2, and 12 year old is a freshman in high school. I told 12yo I’ll bring him to school first day (blink blink).

Why? He asked.

Poker face - stifling my guffaw. Because it’s your first time in highschool, you’re going to a new building, and you’ll say “Mummy, I’m scared.” Then I’ll say, Ok anak, Don’t be afraid, I’ll hold your hand..
He looked at me incredulously. Can you please not go with me?

Nope. I want go with you. (Still stifling guffaw)

Hehe. Needless to say, I went to school first day and looked 8 year old up in class. They were asked to go home early so I waited for 8 year old to get out of school and we both went home.

Of course, I was just sh_tting 12 year old. Hehe


- - -

I read somewhere that another bonding time you can spend with your boys is reading to them the lives of great science men. One of my life regrets is that I didn’t appreciate science enough so I thought I would also benefit if I did this.

But where to start??? Science books make my eyes glass over. 8 year old has a more apt term for it, “BOO-RING.” It’s the combination of Boo and Boring.

Luckily, my sister gave 12 year old the book Dead Famous Scientists two Christmases ago. I saw it in the john (12 year old re-reads time and again in the toilet). I tried reading a little Aristotle bio to 8yo before bedtime. Surprisingly, we had a blast!

Dead Famous Scientists

The book is written for gradeschoolers and shows that scientists, great people as they were, were pretty kooky too. The storytelling is appealing and humorous. It’s nice for parents to read this too so you can apply it to regular conversation with your bigger kids. For younger gradeschoolers, it’ll be easier for them to understand if you read it aloud and simplify/ explain the science concepts and the scientists’ life as you go along.

It would also be nice if you were there to read it with the boys if you want to explain adult behavior. Our great scientists are only human too, after all. Aristotle and Galileo liked boozing their brains away, Isaac Newton had a boyfriend at age 51, Louis Pasteur was a narcissistic nut, Marie Curie had an extramarital affair, etc etc.

Juicy eh?

Last night, we tried out Galileo’s pendulum laws. We timed the pendulum swings and all. You can imagine your kid’s goofy grin if you do the experiments and get the predicted measurements correct.

If I only knew science could be so fun…

Originally posted 19 June 2008

Split Personalities

Hi, all. Been more than a month since I last wrote, sorry. Summer break's ongoing right now. The boys are over at their grandma's and I've been maximizing the time to get out of the house while they're away so I haven't been able to blog. (Also, READ- the subjects of my blog are not with me. LOL! Hence, the silence.)

I often drop by my mom's to spend time with them, and I've been wondering.

How is it that for all the little details we patiently teach our kids day in and day out, they conveniently forget everything once they're in grandma's house?

You know, little selfcare stuff- like brushing the teeth. Or helping around the house.

My mom's complaining how idle one son is. He is uncooperative with chores, and will do everything in his power to wheedle away from a request. I've been reminding him to help out, just as he does at home with me. Sometimes this reminding gets ugly, but it has to be done.

Curiouser and curiouser, when the boys spent a few days with me at our home... Ja-nan! Shift gears. My "idle" son has been washing glasses left at the sink, setting the table and seeing that the little bro has eaten, thank you. Uh-huh, without me asking.

I wanted to ask him, "Ehm.. have you seen my real son around? I think he's been beamed up by aliens into their spaceship and left you behind." Hahaha...

What's the deal about this? Do you have the same experience with your kids?

Originally posted 23 April 2008

Brothers' Rivalry

Oh yes, brother rivalry exists in my house. When they were younger, the bigger brother would turn a tad nasty on the baby when he felt the other one was getting more attention or praise. There were several times when I would see, from start to finish, how the bigger would pinch, hit or do some violence on the small one. As the little one cried and I reprimand him, he would stare blankly and go "What?" as if he didn't do anything.

Fast forward to now, big bro has mellowed a lot. The competition in the house has become a little healthier, but still with the same brand of brotherly taunt.

Their competition focus: academics (Teynks, Gad.)

Every quarter, each competes who has more stars (and the corresponding ranking) and who's higher in the class ranking. Both boys, thankfully, are always in top 10 (or sometimes slipping to 11th). One gets tortured when the other is higher.

Certificates are also a big deal. Any kind of certificate brought home by one (even Most Punctual) is met by the other with big eyes and raised eyebrows.

Last Saturday, 12 year old whipped out another certificate for third quarter, Most Cooperative. He said he was supposed to be given Best Leader for first quarter and Most Responsible for second quarter, but he didn't have the hard copy.

When 8 year old woke up, he stared at the piece of paper suspiciously. "What's that?" Certificate for Most Cooperative. I told him it would've been nice if they've printed out the Best Leader instead. 8 year old scoffed. "Best leader... Maybe he's the best leader of non-leaders!"

A little later, 8 year old asked me for a rag because he wanted to clean the sink (!) As I looked for a rag, he mischievously pointed to the certificate and asked "How about this one?"

Naughty, naughty...



Been reading about sibling rivalry and I've found it's a healthy part of growing up. As long as each child gets the idea that he's loved for whoever/ whatever he is, they'll be alright.

Originally posted 17 March 2008

Activism and Kids

How open are you to teaching your kids about activism?

Activism, after all, is not confined to the streets. It comes from the word "active", hence, it is more about being pro-active on issues you care about. It is not confined exclusively to political participation in the streets. It can also be about your concern with the environment, health, education, gender, etc. Participation can range from joining rallies to the small but important tasks, like segregating trash at home.

My kids grew up seeing me joining rallies and pickets.




I've come a long way from my first ever rally in Baguio when I was a college freshman. I think the issue then was the rollback of oil prices. I enjoyed that rally. I was at the end of the line, goofily shouting "i-rollback, -irollback presyo ng San Miguel (Beer)!" Hahaha... the grim and determineds would've shook their heads if they heard.

12 year old, time and again, has asked if he could come with me to rallies. Of course, I wouldn't let him since there is always the risk of a rally becoming violent.

At least, not yet.

Although it would be pretty useful to have him around a jam-packed place. You can actually bring him to Divisoria on a busy day if you want to be able to pass through. People actually GIVE WAY to this mini-hurricane as he "strolled" through 168 while I was practically jogging behind him, enjoying the opening space a meter at a time ahead of me.

These days, I'm taking a break from rallies. But when I think about it, I can't really keep myself and my boys away from activism. It is, after all, about caring and being pro-active. These are traits I want my boys to live out through their lives. For now, I'm making care for the environment, gender, education and a little politics a default setting in their consciousness.

In a few years, maybe I'll take 12 year old to his first rally -- just to feed him squidballs. :-p

Originally posted 29 February 2008

Stressing Over Feeding

Thing2's stuffed lion eats dog!

For someone who has boys, I spend relatively little on food.

I come from a family that loves to eat. We always kid that our clan gets "sakit ng matatakaw" (diseases of gluttons) -- ie., hypertension from high cholosterol and diabetes. Like other Filipino families, our Sunday luncheons start at the table at noon. The conversations continue throughout the day, STILL at the table. Walang tayuan (Nobody stands up.)

At first we found it kinda weird that my kids and my nephew/ nieces don't like eating. My niece, doesn't like to eat and will do away with eating, if only possible.

During the earlier years, I tried to feed my kids everything. Mealtimes ended in tears, especially for my firstborn.

Eventually I realized that my boys only eat according to their stomach's fill. Which is good. Kids are more in tune with matching the amount of food they eat to their hunger.

When I realized this, I stopped pestering them to eat.

I also noted for several months how they ate, what they liked eating, what food items stayed in the pantry for too long.

I saw that they virtually ignored the cookies and other snacks. They were generally contented with the rice meals. I also found that I bought too much food I was throwing stuff away. Tsk tsk. I also found I was worrying too much about feeding them something new. But really, they were contented and didn't care too much for regular new fare. I was just stressing myself over nothing.

These days, besides getting meat and vegetables, my staples include bread and milk. They are contented with only a pack or two of cookies/ snacks for the week. Big bonus - I can do with a smaller budget!

I still have to remind them to eat vegetables, once in a while. One son also refuses to eat fish, much to my disdain. He eats vegetables voluntarily though, so I let it go.

But generally, I've no problems feeding them.

Teynks Gad...

I hope you're having as easy a time as I am?

Originally posted 22 February 2008

My Best VDay

Have you noticed how some commercial establishments have dropped using the name valentines day for Feb. 14 but instead use Hearts' Day? Maybe they want to drop the connotation with the saint? I deliciously agree this hot and heavy occassion for lovers is far from "saintly".

---

As for me, I barely remember the hot and heavy VDays since it's been so long since I shared one with a lover.

What I do remember are the feb14s with my boys.

We're not a touchy-feely family. And since my boys are high-risk to be apathetic macho-wachos (hereditary hehehe), I've pledged to myself that I would celebrate occassions, no matter how simple, to teach my boys about celebrating love.

That's why, during feb14s, I grab some little treats to show them I love them.

There was one year when 8 year old was at his grandma's, so 12 year old and I trooped out with the masses to grab pizza. We just hung out and talked about school and life for a 3rd?/ 4th? grader. Interesting was when the weekend rolled around and we went home to grandma, 8 year old had also prepared me a card. I don't think he knew how to spell then. He just copied the "happy valentines" print on the heart balloon that I sent him. Sweet.

My ultra-fave feb14 was last year. I got the boys some candy and disappearing ink pens (the ones with the uv lights at the other end). I also wrote them secret "I love you" notes with the disappearing ink. They got a kick out of the notes.

For his part, 12 year old bought 2 flowers and he and 8 year old each gave me one. After lights out, the boys spent some time fiddling with their uv lights in the dark.

What chokes me up was that then-unbrotherly 12 year old SHARED his gift with his little brother. This was the time when he expresses disdain for his little bro 201% of the time, so you can imagine how happy I was for his thoughtfulness.

Hours after the boys went to bed, I could still feel the pride in the swelling of my heart.

Maybe I'm doing something right here.

---

I'll still have that hot and heavy valentines... someday. But right now, I'm enjoying myself with these awkward but nonetheless just as special valentines.

I wonder what gimmick I'll pop out for the boys on Thursday...

Any suggestions?

Originally posted 12 February 2008

Happy Birthday, Booga

It's Booga's 8th birthday!

----

We love our children to death. When their birthdays come around we obsess over the littlest details to guarantee they have the happiest day ever. We obsess so much over what to do, what to cook, gifts to wrap that sometimes we forget to really look.

If we really look,

...We'll see how our child has grown. I told 8 year old that morning, "Anak (My child), you've grown so much... Remember when I used to take you to the office everyday? You were so small then. Now look at you!" His mid-calf shorts now hung above his knees.

... We'll see how funny our child has become. From impersonations, homorous comments and witticisms, our children never run out of "baon".

... We'll see how responsible our child has become. 8 year old also has the mumps this week. I've been pressing him to rest. What he does, instead of rest, is get the broom and dustpan and cleaned their bedroom! Neat freak alert.

... We'll see how they relate as human beings and find that they're a little more considerate, kinder and more affectionate than last time we looked.

A child's birthday is the perfect time to be grateful that you both were given a brief time to be together.

But other than this, make a child's birthday also about (gasp!) YOU. After looking and seeing, don't you think it's also the right time to lay back for several seconds and congratulate yourself for raising a child? While we are working hard to continuously teach and share with our kid, we can be grateful for each little triumph, a day at a time.

And if you do the math, thats 365 triumphs between birthdays.

That's something to pat yourself on the back with. :-)

----
My favorite 8-yo anecdote:
One morning, we were on our way to the office (just three streets away) when I stopped at the gate. "Wait! I told him, I forgot to pack your towels!" As I turned to run back to the house, tiny then four-year old 8year old says "Meron na dito (I have it here)". In my head, I go "Eng??"


Originally posted 07 February 2008

Boys and Chores

I'm sure most parents will agree with me that letting boys do chores around the house helps in building character. However, Filipino parents may disagree on which chores to assign.

For me, I try to teach them all kinds of chores. From the more stereotypical "male" chores - like carpentry, basic electronics, cleaning their own rooms, etc. - to the more down and dirty "feminine" chores (as in kitchen, bathroom, clothes-related chores). I just try to see if they can do a chore, depending on age or ability, and ask them to do these chores during week-ends.

I bring this up because last week-end, my mom, being the old-school Filipina that she is, said "Don't let them do womanly chores, they'll turn gay."

Of course, I gagged. I initially wanted to start an argument. "What's the connection between chores and their sexuality?" I started. But seeing she meant well, and since I won't be able to persuade her anyways, I decided to shut up.

I have several mantras at home that I conveniently bring up, whatever calls for the occassion (read - whenever they're feeling lazy in helping at home).

The format of the mantra goes like this

"ANYBODY WHO _____________ SHOULD KNOW HOW TO ___________."

This can cover all chores. Examples :

Anybody who lives in a house, should know how to clean it.
Anybody who wears clothes, should know how to do the laundry.
(And my personal favorite) Anybody who eats, should know how to cook.

Following this line of reasoning, both guys and girls live in a house, wears clothes and eats. So I don't see why a chore should have gender exclusivity.
The reverse also holds true. Girls should also have at least a brief idea how to do "guy chores".
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Also, one son gives more premium to intelligence. And he really detests housework. I tell the boys part of intelligence is knowing how to do things. That includes knowing how to do chores as well.

Last week, I was watching a tv shopping show and they were selling clothes irons. The hostess, a pampered socialite, encouraged people to buy the iron while admitting she didn't know how to iron her clothes. Gaaack. Major turn off. She looked pretty stupid that moment.

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However, my main reason of ensuring that they at least know how chores are done is independence. I am more secure knowing that whatever happens, wherever they go, they will not die when there are no people to depend on to do the home chores.


How about you, what kind of chores do you let your son/s do?

Originally posted 29 January 2008

Once, Booger (7-year old) asked me what a dirty finger is.

I said, "Um... A finger that touched dust?" Or something more unoriginal. "When you play in the mud and you wash up but forgot to wash your finger?"

I've been a coach for teenage girls and gays for some years. A main issue that we study is the body and sexuality. I'm acutely aware of how we are conditioned by society - starting from our childhood - that our bodies are filthy and bad. Later on in our lives this misconception about our bodies causes complications. I don't think it's a good idea to continue this concept among our young ones.

7year old raises his middle finger. "Why is this a bad finger?"

Huh? What did your finger do that made it bad?

"Nothing."

When you point that middle finger up, does it steal, cheat, or kill people?

"No."

Look at it. What is it, really?

"Just a hand."

Right. It's a part of your body. I don't know why people call body parts bad when these are... just body parts. They don't harm, so I don't see the point why they're bad.

I told him that a raised middle finger is a sign for a penis. And I ask him the same questions.

Are penises bad?

"I don't know."

does it steal, cheat, or kill people?

"No."

So is it bad?

He looks at me and doesn't answer.

It's also a body part. It isn't bad unless we decide to do something bad with it. But then again, the badness comes from the decision and action, not the actual body part.

After that, 8-yo will manage to insert into conversations an assortment of related "bad body part" questions.

I can only answer the same things again and again. I roll my eyes a little at the situations when other children bring this to 8-yo's attention.

I hope that with repetition, my son will evetually get that his body parts (and others' as well) are not dirty.

Unless he rolls in the mud, of course.


Originally posted 23 January 2008

Having Difficulty Putting Boys to Sleep?

In my short stint as parent, I have found a foolproof way to put boys promptly to sleep. Yes, without sugary pleas, threats and shouts.

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It's exams time once again and the boys are back by noon. In contrast to my regular day of heavenly, peaceful silence from morning to 3PM, the house is in a whirlwind of noise today. Electronic strums of a rock "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" scares away my silence. (In fairness, this version of the nursery rhyme sounds nice.) A rhythmic banging of toys on the floor plonks over my head.

I alternately remind and shout for them to "Study for the exams, you guys." The din continues. My reminder/ shouting continues. I'm on Instant Messenger with my sister and I invoke her name. "Tita (Aunt) says you should studyyyyy..." The boys scramble to look at the monitor if their aunt really ordered them to study. 7-year old good-naturedly sticks out his tongue at the message and runs off.

Always, my style is to set a time period for them to finish what they're doing. Then I roll my sleeves and remind firmly and seriously that it's time to study. My poker face is always the cue for them to stop. They get their books and crawl back to their room.

Ah... peace once again.

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So what's the connection between this anecdote and putting boys to sleep?

Put your boys to sleep hassle-free by... making them study.

Yeah, when I checked in on them to see how they're preparing for the exams, there they are.. my angels... so angel-like snoozing, faces under their books.

Tsk-tsk... This is why I make them review for the long exams three weeks before.

I wonder how I'll make them sleep tonight... Oh yeah, I'll make them review for the exams after they're ready for bed.


Originally posted January 2008

Champion is Champion

I'm newly addicted to the local detergent -- Champion!

Smells fresh, fresh, fresh...

Very clean too. Soak socks in it, voila!-- clean socks even without scrubbing. How the fonk do they do that?

Price is in the cheapo league.
I get it in the next-door wet market P11 for 3packs. In landmark grocery, each pack costs P5. Half kilo pack costs similarly to my other fave practical detergent, Pride.

Big bonus: Biodegradable suds and all, like Pride.

I'm so addicted to the smell I want to clean everything with it... even take a bath in it! But I don't have the guts....

Addictions have their boundaries, after all.

Mother Fonking

Hello, world.

This is Kat. I am your resident mother-fonker. I'm a momma, house maid/ nanny/ tumblingera/ online worker/ etc/ etc.

Mothers are a multi-faceted species. We are hallmark-card/ kodak moment poster girls, but we can be funny, dorky and yes, even (ahem!) unreasonable.

What's a fonk?

I have no idea.

But the Urban Dictionary (bless them!) gives us a pretty complete picture.

1. fonk - An extreme form of funk.
Damn, wash yourself! You got fonk.

2. fonk - This is like sayin u have beef with somebody..fonkin
are they still fonkin with them?

3. fonk - (My favorite!) A merger of the words: fart & honk; to describe the sound of a fart when mentioning it.
I laughed so hard, I accidentally released a fonk.

4. fonk - A catch-all word, meaning anything, depending on the context in which it is uttered.

That girl/boy is such a fonk!

5. fonk - A cross between fuck and bonk
"where's Jim?"
"he's upstairs fonking Betty"

6. fonk - An Aussie acronym for the phrase "friend of no cunt"
Spalding wasn't very popular. In fact he was the biggest fonk any of them had ever met.

Oh yeah, mothers are fonkers, all right.